So this is what being in your 30s looks like. This is what it means to thoroughly think through decisions and make only the ones that would affect me positively through the coming years. Now I think of the kind of men that could be coming, the kind of men that I dated and the kind of men that are around me now. The men around me now seem more mature than the men I met while in my bloody 20s. My thoughts though! For real, the men now want the same thing: Sex, Sex, Sex and more Sex. They come up with different tactics to get this. Just one or two that probably want a relationship but then they get impatient and jet-out leaving you wondering what their intentions were in the first place.
These days my hormones seem to be all over the place and with palms to my cheeks I wonder why it’s harder to find a good man to be with in my 30s than my bloody 20s. The nights have become lonely with tears of me wanting the breath from a strong, handsome man down my neckline and back. Hands around my waist assuring me that tomorrow will be a better day or just a call to that ‘beautiful man’ nagging about my work, my annoying sisters or my best friends. If there’s one thing I have come to notice, at 30 a lot of men will hover around you and leave you to time and chance. They let you think something must be wrong with you by being mute about their intentions towards you. Then you take these men unconsciously with you through your 30s and before you know it, BAAAAM!!! 40! And very much single.
I met this guy I’ll refer to as ‘Mr O’ . A tall, handsome, single man with an Einstein brain for making money. He’s everything a girl could ask for and a bag of Chips but he’s a very stereotyped Igbo man. Only a few would understand his person. You can’t tell Mr.O to try something new, he would give you 7 reasons why his choice stands. Strange that someone as uptight as Mr O can have a healthy sense of humor. Strange. The problem with Mr.O is, he is very slow and meticulous. He takes his time in studying people and most times I feel like I’m under his microscope waiting for various experiments to happen to test my patience. Many months have gone by and I wonder why he hasn’t stepped a foot forward to ask me out. What could he possibly be looking for in me? And if I wasn’t his type, why won’ he just free me and move on to the next woman?
Another one, ‘Yoruba guy’ who doesn’t know what to do with me cos we are so much alike. Yoruba guy is another fine, smart, single dude. The social media guy. One I can totally date but being so much alike, we quarreled a lot. The chemistry is amazing but we both know nothing can come out from our union. Someone might just die (LOL) but he won’t GO!!! Why? It’s beyond me.
Then there’s ‘Slim‘, who left me for another girl his heart yearned for. Things having not worked out between them got him back in my nest and I have no idea what he wants now.
Oh yea!! The shy ‘Business man’ who’s in love with me but finds it hard to express himself……
Geez!!!! Don’t get me wrong, I feel there’s more for me out there and not necessarily any one of the male scenarios up there but in a situation whereby I have these men around me, I can only ask in pidgin English- “How I wan see road’? How do I see others out there? How do I meet THE ONE? Could any one of these men be the chosen one? Why do men hover around women without saying what they want? They just want to be there and act like they are already in a relationship with you without your knowledge. They tell you things like Hey Baby, I miss you , Let’s take each day as it comes, Let’s start as being good friends, Why haven’t you replied my pings all day , You have gone cold suddenly, I like you a lot , And you would make a good wife o …. Life would be a lot easier if men stated their intentions and women respond according. Don’t waste her time hovering around like a monkey and unconsciously confusing the next man who might have better intentions. Quit making her feel like she’s yours when you’ve done nothing to make her yours. Own her. STEP FORWARD, SPEAK OUT,state your case. What’s the worse that she could say- YES or NO? While I’ve decided to wait for the one whose heart and mine will beat as one, I will begin the week by getting rid of the male-hovers around me. All of you must go. In case you fall under this category, speak now and let me give you my final answer. You might think Age is nothing but a number but someone also said-Time waits for nobody. I rest my case.