When this topic hit me early this morning, I laughed at myself because I knew my friends would say ‘thermochic has come again’. Indeed I have. For those who don’t know Methuselah, he was Noah’s grandfather,the oldest man in the bible who lived for 969years. Adding courtship right after grandpa Methuselah will give you a better understanding of what this post is all about. Courtship is and should be the coming together of a man and woman who just made a commitment to themselves to walking down the aisle and live as Man and wife. I do not know how courtship is done around the world as I am not well travelled,don’t have foreign friends and don’t believe the Mills and Boon stories however, I am aware of how it’s done in my country- Nigeria. What I see these days are women prematurely tied down and emotionally spent in their relationships of more than 4years. I, personally believe that a man who can walk up to a girl and state his intentions for a relationship knows already if she is a wife ‘fabric’ or not. What I see these days are relationships going as far as 7,8,9,10years. My sister(now married) dated her husband for almost 13years,by the 13th year they were married. At some point they had a misunderstanding and her husband(boyfriend back then) called off the relationship, my sister attempted suicide. Silly girl!! Her words were “Where would I start from?” “Who would marry me in my 30’s?” And she was just 31 when it happened. I hate to think that there are still girls who are so comfortable and happy celebrating 9years of being some guy’s GIRLFRIEND. Why put yourself through all that emotional drama? Some girls are frustrated but cannot do anything but stay put there in uncertainty. I won’t talk about sex in a relationship that has been on for 7years because I know for sure you both are getting ‘some’ but know this,that the guys who put their girlfriends through this are selfish, self centered and self seeking. You hear the guys use words like ‘don’t worry very soon’ or ‘ I will marry you,don’t worry’ WHEN? Is it when she’s in her mid 30’s or early 30’s? At that stage if the relationship doesn’t work out,the girls are either suicidal or depressed. This is the part where all the religious houses become filled up with spinsters in late 30’s. Why date a girl for 8/9years? What exactly aren’t you sure of? For me, 4years is the highest I can go. We know each other for a year plus, by the 2nd year put a ring my finger already, by the third year we have over a year to plan(with God’s help) our wedding and by the fourth year can we just get to the altar already. If you need more than a year to get to know me before you propose, then we both are unreal to each other.
A friend of mine on my BBM and I were chatting and I asked if her boyfriend had proposed and she said “No. He’s taking his time,we don’t want to rush into anything”. What I could deduce from those words were ‘Nne what can I do? I’ve been begging him for a ring,biko I’ve left him to God’. They have been dating for over 7years without a break. Seriously? Another friend of mine wants a child from his girlfriend he adores and loves so much but he too is taking his time. May I ask, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? If you say you are not ready,why ask her out in the first place? And if you say it’s money, why not work hard,save up then ask the young lady out? Men, stop wasting our time, lives and emotions. Do you want us to be worn out early in marriage(to you or not)? It is true that women know in less than 6months if the man she’s with is husband ‘fabric’,why do guys need 5years for this? Is this how long it took you before you put Unilag as your first choice? Is this how long it took you before you moved out of your parents’ house? Is this how long it took you to know that Jesus Christ is Lord? Then why the wait? Please step up your game and put a ring on it. She warms your bed, cooks your food, does your laundry,cleans your house, talks to your mother and sisters, attends family functions in aso ebi with you, you might as well just MARRY HER.
Young ladies, pregnancy is not the way to speed up a proposal. Ask that man who is interested in you what his plans are. State it from the beginning that you don’t want a courtship as long as Bourdillon road and as old as Yaba. Then again, if you don’t mind spending more than 4years with your man, know that you are setting yourself up for depression.
Today, let’s just say I am slightly worried about this long relationships happening everywhere, the new fad it seems. I may not have the perfect of relationships, I may not be a professional writer or counselor, I may be too weird in my thinking but if there’s one thing you must know ladies,is that THERMOCHIC is saying NO TO METHUSELAH COURTSHIP……(lol)